10 quick thoughts about weekend getaways

This past weekend, Kyle and I went to New York City for a romantic getaway. Well, that’s not 100% true.

We went because I was asked to sign books at BookCon. My publisher flew me out and put me in a fun little hotel in the Garment District, so we just tacked on an extra flight for Kyle, asked my parents pretty please could you hang with the grandkids for a few days, and headed out.

This wasn’t our first weekend away, but it’s the first in a long while. And boy howdy, was it good.

Here’s a few things I remembered about quick weekends away with the one you love:

1. Pack super light. You’re only gone for the weekend—that’s hardly any time. Enough casual clothes for most of the time, plus pajamas and one dress/outfit for going out. Done. You’ll have so much more fun not thinking about the stuff you brought.

2. Wear comfortable shoes. Whether you’ll walk around the whole time (hi, Manhattan) or veg with a book in a guesthouse backyard, there’s zero reason to wear on your feet anything but comfy.

3. Don’t try to “see it all.” You won’t anyway, so just pick a few things and savor them slowly.

4. Plan for leisurely meals—they don’t have to be fancy. The best conversations happen over food, so don’t rush them. We spent hours one lunch plotting parts of a book idea Kyle has for me.

5. Talk about the kids. But then move on, and talk about you. Talk about how you’re doing individually and in your work, and talk about your relationship.

6. Don’t force deep. If you don’t have Big Important Things to talk about, don’t invent them. Enjoy talking about the silly and mundane, like when you were dating.

7. Bring cards, or a card game. We’ve had many a date in our marriage playing a game at a coffee shop. Cheap and fun. It’s fun on weekend getaways, too.

8. Wander. Leave time to explore, be it on foot, public transport, or in a car. Don’t have an agenda—look around at shops, trees, whatever.

9. Stay up and/or sleep in. Especially if you have kids. It’ll feel foreign, but it’ll be fun. Walk around at night, then ‘airplane mode’ your phone before bed so your body wakes up whenever it wants.

10. Don’t wait too long to plan the next one. I’m thinking we need to make this past weekend an annual thing for us

13 Comments

  1. Libby

    I love this so much! My husband and I don’t have kids but it’s *still* crucial to get away sometimes. Just getting out of our familiar places cause us to draw towards one another. When we first got together, I’d try so hard to “force deep”… but I’ve found that I can feel just as close and connected to my husband after a day of simple fun as I do after a late night of talking about our hopes and dreams.
    PS Loved watching you and Anne Bogel’s IG stories! I want to go to book con so badly, now!

  2. Annelise

    Old married life is the BEST! 🙂 ( yea, we’re not old either but we sometimes feel like we’re either old or teenagers when we too play cards and pack comfortable shoes!)

  3. Linda Sand

    We ARE old, having been married for more than 50 years now. But we still play cards and pack comfortable shoes. Actually, we wear comfortable shoes and pack slippers. Yes, even after retirement it is nice to get away from the demands of everyday life now and then and just be together.

  4. Nikki (NYNomads)

    These are such sweet things to remember on a quick trip! You’re so right, make your time together light and fun, it will be much more enjoyable that way. We’ve been nomadically living in NYC for a few years now, and try to stick to these rules even so!

    http://www.nynomads.com
    Living sustainably on $100/week in NYC

  5. tracy

    Sounds like a fun time! So, what comfortable shoes do you pack Tsh?

    • Tsh Oxenreider

      I wore these all weekend in NYC, and they were great!

  6. Tiffany

    Please, please, all – share which card games you play with just 2 people?? I love this idea but War and Uno are the only things I can think of : )

    • Tsh Oxenreider

      Other than the infinite games you can play with a classic deck of cards (gin rummy), Phase 10 is one of our go-to favorites.

      I also did a quick search and found this resource, with more games than anyone could possibly play! 🙂

  7. Stephanie Ahlborn

    My husband and I just returned from what our midwife called a “babymoon” as I am 8 months pregnant with our first child. Our idea was to have one last trip together before we are responsible for a tiny human. 🙂
    Unfortunately, as my husband is still in the mode of wanting to see it all and experience everything, we did almost nothing with leisure like I had hoped and expressed prior to our departure. Our trip went by in a blur that we ended up feeling like we needed to recover from.
    I have slowly tried to integrate simplicity into our lives over the last year (about the time I discovered this awesome blog) and have definitely felt push back from the wonderful but somewhat stubborn man I live with. However, as we were driving home, he brought up the conversation of our next trip not being so hurried and chaotic. He even suggested we may have enjoyed ourselves more had we not rushed from one thing to the next.
    I think sometimes, we just need to experience the frustration and exhaustion from doing too much to be able to appreciate the peace and satisfaction that comes from slowing down.
    Thank you Tsh for this list you have compiled. I will definitely be referring to it in the future.

  8. Aimee Wimbush-Bourque

    Love this Tsh! And love that you had that time together. Danny and I are still starry-eyed from our long weekend in London (5 days). I pinch myself all the time; and yes it really happened!

  9. Jolene Ejmont

    We love heading away for weekends or short holidays and I think it is so incredibly beneficial for the adults to just be adults and to spend some good quality time together! I’m actually hanging out for our next parent-escape but our little bubba is still a bit too young so gotta wait 🙂

    The best? Late nights and sleep ins and those peaceful dinners out!!

  10. Theresa Boedeker

    Definitely comfortable shoes. We end up walking a lot to explore on vacations. Also not talking a lot about the kids. This is time for the two of you. No need to drag the kids along with you by talking about them. Some teasing, flirting, and laughing are also good to do.

  11. Kelsi Folsom

    I love these tips! My husband and I are about to leave for a “weekend” getaway on St. Martin. We live on Saba, Dutch Caribbean right now as he attends medical school, and St. Martin is the nearest island. We love playing games and I am excited to have some new ones to try out on our trip. Or we might just sleep at the beach.all day. haha

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