February 6, 2013 at 12:05 AM
February 6, 2013 at 12:15 AM
We write a blog about renovating our home and the lessons we learn through doing that. Couldn’t agree with you more. I used to live in a home that needed no work, but it wasn’t a happy one because love was missing. Now, the list of projects is long, but it doesn’t matter because love takes the edge off all those “flaws.” If the process of working on the house doesn’t bring us closer together, we take a break from all projects until it does again.
Katherine Broadway says
February 6, 2013 at 12:24 AM
A breath of fresh air, thank you!
Dana B says
February 6, 2013 at 12:49 AM
Well said and timely, too. I was just thinking I needed to add some Valentine decorations to my house but I realize now, I don’t. Just tidying and making homemade Valentines will be memorable and lovely enough for my boys.
The Accidental Housewife says
February 6, 2013 at 4:18 AM
We move regularly and often – we’ve been together nine years and lived in seven cities – but this move we needed to drastically downsize. Two skip bins and a truck load of junk later, I’ve definitely come to the realisation that stuff is superfluous to happiness. In fact, it can choke it, if caring for your stuff takes up too much time. So now we live a simpler, but still very happy life. I think the energy each person brings into the home is the most vital ingredient to a happy household. If one parent is grumpy, it’s almost a guarantee it will rub off on the rest of the family! By no one should have to fake happy…. So if someone here has the grumps, they win a whole bucketful of alone time 😉
Robin from Frugal Family Times says
February 6, 2013 at 7:30 AM
Lovely post, Emily! We make our home happy by putting our family first in all our decisions, be it decorating or work hours or commitments. Having a home filled with pretty stuff feels good, but a home filled with laughter trumps that any day!
February 6, 2013 at 7:54 AM
I absolutely ADORE your site and I luv coming here to read your articles. My favourite was the article about working from home and I’ve saved it on my laptop to keep reminding myself not to give up and do what I need to do. I still get dressed and look “present” even though I’m home
As such I have nominated you for The Addictive Blog Award!
Thanks for all the hard work and great articles, here’s to MANY,MANY more 😀
February 6, 2013 at 8:27 AM
Well said and so very true! Beautiful post Emily! XOXO
Brittnie (A Joy Renewed) says
February 6, 2013 at 8:29 AM
Love love love this post. So true and timely for me. Our home feels complete when there is lots of fun and laughter and hugs.
Jenn @ A Simple Haven says
February 6, 2013 at 8:31 AM
What a good reminder. And I built a lego tower with my daughter yesterday, so I was nodding in agreement on that point. To make my home happy, I keep music playing throughout the day, tickle my kids often, and get everyone involved in daily tidy-up time.
February 6, 2013 at 9:33 AM
How timely – last night in Bible study we were reflecting on contentment (in Phillipians 4) and I had some comments to contribute that sound much like your post. Thanks for the reminder to continue to learn and grow in this area. My house will NEVER be “done” the way I’d ideally like, but I have peace in living in this house with my most important people, my husband and our 2 beautiful kids.
February 6, 2013 at 10:20 AM
I used to get caught up in what others had, too. That just created unhappiness and discontentment. I have learned to love my home and in turn can now enjoy and love the time spent in it. I find joy in doing chores together, in cooking dinner and in cuddling up on the couch to watch movies. It’s the little things…
Prerna@The Mom Writes says
February 6, 2013 at 10:31 AM
Ahh… LOVE your post and SO true too.. I agree, I am happiest when the messes are hitting the fan, literally.. but my daughter’s face beams with glee.. I used to stress about perfection and the shine.. but what really matters is the sheen of happiness that envelops our family at the end of the day:-)
February 6, 2013 at 10:41 AM
What a beautiful (and timely for me) post this is! I just helped a family from my church clean their GIANT home as they were packing up to move. I left there that night feeling jealous of/a little depressed that the shower in one of the bathrooms was as big as my kitchen (seriously — and my kitchen isn’t terribly small), wanting the fireplaces upstairs and down, dreaming about the mini movie theater, and bothered by the fact that the smallest bedroom was as big as the master bedroom in my home. But now that I’ve read your post and I look around, I see the flowers I got at the grocery store on the kitchen table and the cute paper hearts my son cut out and hung all over the cabinets, it really doesn’t take a lot to feel content. Thank you for the reminder!
February 6, 2013 at 10:53 AM
So refreshing to hear you talk about what is really important in life and how you have managed to find priorities that will help your family to thrive, love and enjoy life!
February 6, 2013 at 12:07 PM
How appropriate and much needed for me to read this…especially after I have just been thinking about being more “present” to my kids rather than being swept up by all the distractions I get internally or externally! Thanks for the post!
abigail gray says
February 6, 2013 at 12:47 PM
I also look around my house and try to find ways to improve on it…even though I rent. We moved into our apartment with no intentions of staying more than a year. Three years later we are still here…still here with pink and green tile in the kitchen….and in all the bathrooms. Yes pink and green like a watermelon. Everything also has gold trim. Now how fancy is that lol? After the shock of the tacky decor we actually learned to like the place. That is until the new neighbors moved in below us. They are the type that say their kids never played and made noises like ours do. So hopefully soon we can get a house that may not be beautiful all the time but my kids will be able to play without anyone getting mad at us.
Emily (Random Recycling) says
February 6, 2013 at 1:26 PM
Such a wonderful reminder. I’m trying to let go of the stress I feel when the kids are creating a mess. Couch forts are a regular occurrence lately. I’m hopeful if I allow my kids their space, they will fill it with their own imagination.
Heidi of 'Operation Organization - MN' says
February 6, 2013 at 4:57 PM
YES! Thanks Emily!!
Zoe Alexander says
February 6, 2013 at 5:18 PM
Emily, you are so right! It’s so easy to get trapped on the materialistic changes needed in life and lose sight of the core values that are the people in our lives that create happiness. I feel the stress of building a new business with a baby on the way and a daughter who is rapidly approaching 3 y.o. yet my husband and i have learnt to focus on grabbing quality time with our daughter rather than worrying about all the usual daily chores and business worries. Keeping life in perspective is so important too!
February 6, 2013 at 8:58 PM
I’m burnt out on interior design blogs and magazines. I love the beautiful images but I want to invest in what comes after the design. A great space provides the stage for a family to want to be together. To create a happy family has me more excited than design trends. Function matters as much as form. Thanks for an awesome blog post!
February 6, 2013 at 10:24 PM
Amen. Too many mamas are completely caught up in making their homes look like something out of Real Simple (“real boring” if you ask me and my kids! ;)). It truly does break my heart. Children will remember the time you spent with them, not the “fab” things you had in your house and how impressed you made other people. We are preparing to move overseas in just two suitcases a piece, and seriously, my kids have never been happier! Most cultures are relational…and most of the populous countries are very poor compared to the US…we should take a few clues from them to see what happiness really consists of, and what it doesn’t. Since we don’t have a big house and fancy stuff, we don’t have to spend much time taking care of it. Instead, we spend the time caring for each other and our community. (We intentionally chose this life when, with our educational backgrounds, we could have easily joined the American rat race.) The number one thing I hear from those we have over to our home (who, by the way, would likely see us as “poor” ;)) is “Your house is so peaceful.” Yes, I am so thankful to live with just what we need…and the thing we need most is LOVE. Mamas, please hear this message! I dare you to try it…you’ll be amazed at how freeing it is to stop being a “consumer” and start being a “giver”!
Lisa Olaynack says
February 6, 2013 at 10:36 PM
We live happily in our home to make it happy. we don’t sweat the small stuff. For example, we love our Christmas tree so much, it is still up:)
February 7, 2013 at 8:09 AM
100% agree, very well said!
February 7, 2013 at 10:37 AM
This is such a great post!!! I love it!!! People before things isn’t just a mantra!!!
Trina Cress says
February 8, 2013 at 10:41 PM
This is a beautiful take on simplicity and contentment. I agree, I am so much happier “curing” my home with fresh flowers, fixing something or cleaning something. And I am far happier when I instead enjoy the people that create that home.
Katie B. of HousewifeHowTos.com says
February 9, 2013 at 4:41 PM
This is such a nice change of pace from reading lifestyle blogs written by women who just finished redoing every room in their house, and are now eager to start redoing them all again. I’m happy when my home is tidy, smells fresh (we have cats and boys, after all) and we’re all home together.
February 10, 2013 at 1:25 AM
Love this post, refelects my thoughts entirely but doesn’t hurt to be reminded! We’ve chosen for me to be a FT SAHM and with that decision come sacrifices, but they are mostly, if not all, material. We don’t have a fancy home and never will, and while it would be nice to have enough money to replace the uncomfy, hideous sofa with the mystery stain, I’ve accepted with each day I spend with my very young girls that it will never be replaced at least in the next 10 years or so – and I’m good with that now. It’s incredibly freeing to just stop caring what people think. Folks can like us for who we are, not the stuff we have / don’t have, and if the stuff we don’t have bothers them, well, they’re not worth bothering about. I’m so happy I have finally arrived at this point Love your blog, another awesome post!
February 12, 2013 at 5:16 AM
February 12, 2013 at 3:27 PM
This is SO true! Thank you so much for this post. My husband and I are thinking of moving, and I keep finding myself day dreaming about how we could decorate or remodel our new house, but usually, it only leaves me feeling forlorn or stressed because it will never be as picture perfect as I want it to be. The thing that really makes me happy is when I consider all of the friends that we will have over to our new home for dinner parties and game nights and movie nights. Just having our community in our home, filling it with love, is more valuable then having my home design featured in a magazine.
Jennifer K says
February 14, 2013 at 10:46 AM
Loved this post. There’s a quality of “feeling at home” that takes time (not stuff). We recently moved after living in the same house for 10 years, the only house my children knew. We had done a lot of remodeling to it and I miss the stuff that was exactly what I picked out. I look back and remember that even with all the stuff we did to that house that I think I miss, there were still things I had wished were different (higher ceilings, less weeds, bigger bathrooms, better climate!). But what I miss most is how comfortable I felt there, that “feeling at home” quality, being in a house that so many good memories were attached to and continuing to be made. Surely that doesn’t come from the right cabinets or floor or paint. I know we will achieve that here too, with time, and I look forward to it. THAT is what makes a house a home. (I think I just started one of my upcoming posts!)
February 15, 2013 at 1:10 AM
This is a tough one for me because I have full blown PMDD that I am trying to control with diet and exercise. It is very difficult and causes many tears at times. For me making my home happy is usually very easy. But there are times in the month when it is like a nightmare and it is all I can do just to complete even the smallest task without completely melting down. The worse is when I eat processed food the best is when I eat clean vegetarian. The later is very difficult with my busy lifestyle. Wait, I am rambling, this is another symptom. So, to get to the point. The way I make my home happy during the dark days is to say I need help. Please help me, it hurts and I can’t deal with my high crazy emotions. I would go on, but unless you have experienced real PMDD you will never get it. Thank you much for the article. I am sorry I spoke so much. Peace to you and yours always,
February 15, 2013 at 1:15 AM
oh wait, my momma always said Its not the “stuff’ we have but the “stuffing” we give. I aim to give a whole lot of good stuffing to my family in this life of mine. I am going to stuff them with kind words, love, a good story, a clean heart, and lots of good clean food. As for the stuff, if they want stuff they get a few things here and there but any other stuff will be earned during that part-time job in high school and cleaning up puppy poop in the yard now, when they are short enough to still reach it really quick.
February 18, 2013 at 4:02 PM
i like this. stuff can make a pretty house. only we can make a happy home.